Thursday, November 09, 2006

What I Do When I Should Be Writing # 2

IF SUPERVISING AN OFFICE WAS LIKE BEING A PARENT

·You would have to assure your employees that every time you got up to leave your desk you would be right back. Really.

·Employees would follow you into the bathroom, asking you “pertinent” questions that simply could not wait 5 minutes.

·You would be responsible for providing employee meals, making sure they are nutritionally balanced and that they ate it all. Or no dessert.

·Paper cuts would entail a 15-minute comfort period, and a cute character bandage for the injured party as well as the co-worker with a sympathy “owie”. Worker’s compensation would require a kiss on the injured area and/or a cookie.

·When your partner comes into the office after being out all day or on a business trip, all of the employees cheer, ignoring you and the last directive you issued.

·Out of office meetings must not delay employees’ lunch hour (this is a union rule).

·Employees would require daily reminders to keep their office supplies off of the floor (“Because if someone steps on that stapler and breaks it you’re not getting another one.”).

·Office parties would inevitably end in crying jags and cake on the ceiling.

·You would be required to take your vacations with your employees and go someplace that interests them.

·Only after your employees are gone for the day can you get any work accomplished.

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5 Comments:

At 6:12 PM, Blogger Sierra Donovan said...

Cathy, man oh man, do I hear you on this one! Especially this point:

When your partner comes into the office after being out all day or on a business trip, all of the employees cheer, ignoring you and the last directive you issued.

When my husband arrives home from work, you'd think he got there just in time to rescue the kids from being dipped in boiling oil. I swear, I'm not THAT bad....

Sierra

 
At 8:00 AM, Blogger Meretta said...

Too funny, Cathy! I especially like the stapler comment. ;)

 
At 10:17 AM, Blogger Cathy in AK said...

Thanks, ladies! I got a lot of inspiration from working in an office myself and talking to my mother who was a long-time office manager. She's said she thought that when she went to work she could leave her parenting skills at home and vice versa, but no : )

 
At 6:13 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

OMG-I about wet myself laughing! I especially loved the office party. I think I've been to a few that ended up like that

Sharron McClellan
(I'd log in but I switched to beta-blogger and now I can't. I HATE betablooger!)

 
At 6:48 AM, Blogger Typing Slave said...

cake on ceiling = the funnee

 

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