Monday, December 13, 2010

What Am I Thinking?

My husband and I have been together too long.

We'll be celebrating our 19th anniversary this February. (Actually, our 4 3/4th anniversary. Work it out ; ) The number of years isn't the issue. It's how we rarely have to say a word yet still know what's going on in each other's heads. We can sit in a room watching TV, or listening to the kids' conversations, and some phrase or topic will come up. We just have to look at each other and we'll both smile knowingly. We can spend hours in a room or in a car together and exchange no more than a dozen words, but not feel awkward or like we need to fill the silence.

But the other day took the proverbial cake.

Hubby was in Anchorage for several days. He had a meeting or two to attend and did some Christmas shopping as well. I'd given him a list of the few items I wanted for the girls and knew he'd add to it as well as pick up stocking stuffers. While he was away, he called to confirm that I hadn't thought up anything to add. Nope, I'm good, I said. See you in a couple of days.

The day before he came home, I was watching our eldest daughter play World of Warcraft and thought back to my high school and college days as a Dungeons and Dragons role-playing game geek. We've told the girls about these old school pencil, paper and dice games, and they were intrigued. In a time when video stimulus is the norm, the actual use of imagination is rare. Both our girls are chock full of imagination, and I thought maybe it would be fun to introduce them to the world of Dungeons and Dragons some day. Something came up, as it usually does, and my mind went on to other things.

Then Hubby returned from the Big City the following day. Guess what he had bought the day before? Yep! A D&D starter set. I was floored. We had not said two words about the game in months and months while in the same room, yet here he was holding up a familiar box and smiling. I sputtered and told him that I had just been thinking about it. He laughed, but I think he was a little freaked out too.

There are great advantages to having a loved one know you so well you don't have to explain yourself or try to suss out what, exactly they are thinking. On the other hand, I wonder what I think he *doesn't* know that he really does....



At 4:13 PM, Blogger Maria Zannini said...

This happens to us all the time. Made all the more weird because we've lived apart for 11+ years.

I say that's the true test of a sound relationship.

At 9:12 PM, Blogger Cathy in AK said...

Agreed about the sound relationship, Maria, but it's still kinda weird : )

At 11:50 AM, Blogger Writer and Cat said...

If I couldn't tell what DH was thinking, we'd never have "conversations".

At 12:25 PM, Blogger Cathy in AK said...

But W&C, by knowing what he's thinking you should be able to AVOID conversations : ) I sure do!

At 6:24 AM, Blogger LVLM(Leah) said...

That's a cute story.

I think many long term couples have some psychic link.

I wonder which comes first though, the couple just "get" each other and have that link so they become a long term couple? Or a couple is together for a long time and they get to know how each other thinks?

My husband and I are like that as well. We can spend hours together and not say a word, but we are sharing and getting each other.

I'm glad though that he totally can't read my thoughts heh. I don't want to know all of his either. Some mystery has to be there. :-)

Congrats on 19 years!!!

At 7:06 AM, Blogger Cathy in AK said...

Hubby and I were good friends before we ever considered being a couple, so we already knew each other quite well and shared similar interests and attitudes. Is that comfort level part of what prompted us to eventually get together? Maybe. Probably : ) Whatever it was, it's worked so far.

But yes, a little mystery is good too. I'm tickled when I can surprise him in some way : )

At 5:57 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

COOL! Sounds like you and yours are as good a match as me and mine. We tend to do things like that too. :)

And of course, you and yours have been matched just as long as me and mine. Perhaps there's something magical about that particular day???

As for D&D, we've thought about introducing it to our BDs, as well. We're starting them out with something similar, but a little less complicated...Settlers of Catan. I know it won't match D&D, but I'm hoping it'll be at least a little entertaining!

At 8:01 AM, Blogger Cathy in AK said...

Meretta, between our b-days, wedding days, and enjoyment of geeky role-playing games, I am more and more convinced we are related in some way. Or were in a past life or two together : )


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